Alone
Wednesday, April 22nd, 2009“Alone” is a word full of potential emotional power. It is a state of separation from others – isolation. It may be sought after and treasured or it may be thrust upon us and dreaded. Wanting to be alone for a time is a natural and popular reaction to the crush of people, noise, and activity assaulting our senses and typically indicates self-awareness and a healthy level of comfort with one’s own skin. (continued below)
Hi. My name is Brad Lombardi and I am a licensed professional counselor with offices in Branson MO. I am also an ordained minister with 23 years of pastoral experience. I counsel from a Christian viewpoint, attempting to integrate Biblical principles with sound psychology. I provide counseling services for:
- Families
- Couples
- Individuals
looking for hope, healing, and growth.
My primary specialties are:
- Marriage counseling
- Pre-marital counseling
- Anger Management
- Pornography Addiction
- Adolescent Male Issues
- Adult Male Issues
- Unwanted Homosexual Feelings
I am available to speak in Churches and civic organizations, and for seminars and retreats. (See Topics)
My office in Branson is at 1790 Bee Creek Road (map)
At this time, I do not accept insurance. I will gladly give you a receipt to submit to your insurance company for a refund. I do accept Medicaid for qualified children and adolescents.
To make an appointment, or for further information:
- call 417-894-0103
- email bradlombardi@yahoo.com
continued….
Alone time can be a valuable asset, providing a time of refreshing, a period of reflection, or an opportunity for creativity. Negatively, an obsessive desire to be alone may be an indicator of a withdrawal from reality, a rejection of friends and family, or a negative self-image. On the opposite end of the spectrum from being alone is living in community. Community means enjoying satisfying connections - loving and being loved by others. Studies have consistently shown that people with healthy relationships (living in community) enjoy better health, less stress, and greater happiness. A popular theory in psychology introduced by Abraham Maslow suggests that once the basic physiological needs of food and shelter have been met and safety and security have been procured, men feel most fulfilled by seeking the social and community needs of love, affection, and a sense of belonging.
There has always been a tension between the desire to connect with others and the freedom of the solitary life. On one hand, relationships often require work, compromise, and cooperation. On the other hand, being alone, while easier, lacks the joy and fulfillment of healthy relationships. At this time our society places such high value on individual freedom that the benefits of living in community are in danger of being overshadowed. Furthermore, our generation, enchanted by the illusion of ‘virtual relationships’ through such mediums as chat rooms, Facebook, My Space, and Twitter, has increasingly isolated itself. What these offer in terms of ease, speed, and quantity, is countered by the lack of intimacy, face-to-face contact, and commitment that form the brick and mortar of relationships. The result is a predictable epidemic of loneliness.
This loneliness often becomes an ache in the mind and heart, a hole in the soul that needs to be filled. A recent study at the University of Chicago, using fMRI scans to investigate connections between loneliness and activity in the brain, has found that regions of the brain associated with empathy and rewards are affected by loneliness. This would seem to suggest that lonely people tend to seek comfort in non-social places. (ScienceDaily, Feb. 17, 2009) Meaningless sex, experimental drug use, and high risk activities are often used to fill that void, but with little long-term success and with many potentially harmful side-effects. Science has yet to find a suitable substitute for good friends. If you are lonely, make some friends. Don’t wait for someone else to make the first move. Put yourself out there and be the friend you want to have. You’ll be glad you did.